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Coronavirus charities served:
NSPCC • WAGE CONCERN • AMNASTY INTERNATIONAL • ENSLAVE THE CHILDREN
Temporarily Closed Due to Pox Pandemic. Back soon.
You can throw them a lifeline, by buying clothes from our shelves
We have skirts and shirts and socks and slacks and boots and suits and frocks and macs
By spending just a few pence – you can make a difference
You can end starvation and deprivation,
You can provide sanitation and operations – with a generous monthly donation …
We prefer donations via standing order or direct debit. So please
Look around our shop,
Choose a charity,
and make the arrangements with your bank.
And do it today.
Please don’t turn up here and dump bin bags on our doorstep – Just because you can’t be arsed to go to the land fill
pretending you’re Greta-fucking-Garbage.
Don’t give me bags of soiled underpant, broken cassette players, and used cat litter.
We want your cash!
(NSPCC – Non-Stop Parties Canapés & Champagne)
Financial assistance urgently needed to ease the plight of those trapped on luxury cruise liners.
Guests are going to bed WITHOUT a sweetie on the pillow.
“Some have completely run out of chilled Chablis” Said Dave who has lived in the doorway of the Citizens Advice Bureau since it closed down.
“I heard they’ve nearly run outof swan!” Commented Pete, who lived in the doorway of Help the Homeless: -until they evicted him.
END THIS CRUELTY NOW!
Homes are now occupied twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. Burglars are being denied the chance of earning an honest wage.
Will you help? A donation of just seven shillings a month can provide a burglar with the weapons he needs to become a kidnapper and feed his family.
Ten shillings a month can buy him a balaclava, restraints and the glue and newspaper cuttings to construct ransom notes.
Please help. If you have one of those new telephone things, just text: “Arm a criminal”
(AM Nasty International)
No one is going out, so spare a thought for the poor muggers who can’t find anyone to mug.
“Its been very quiet” said one mugger, “I need financial assistance from the Chancellor, but the fuckin pakki has offered us nowt!” Can you help him?
ENSLAVE THE CHILDREN
(enSlave the Children)
With no schools open, and all children locked indoors, there are bleak prospects for the paedophiles. The bushes near schools and nurseries are deserted. Paeds are faced with a choice: Either go on-line and re-visit all those left-handed websites, again.
Or – Buy new children from a Romanian orphanage.
But this is expensive- can YOU help?